Humans of CNU

Photo by Chris Shea, Humans of CNU

Today, right as I got to the prayer station, a student came up and asked if he could sit down.  He wondered if I was familiar with Humans of New York and said that he was doing Humans of CNU and that he'd like to take a picture of me and talk to me.  I said sure.  He asked me about the prayer station and why I was doing it.  He asked me what I was passionate about and what my hobbies were.  We had a lovely conversation, and he permitted me to say a prayer before he took my picture and went on his way.  I was honored to meet him and to be the subject of one of his posts.  You can see what he posted here. 

The interview was the beginning of an afternoon of conversations and prayer requests - it might have been the most I've had in one day.  My extra chair was filled most of the time, and people would come up for prayers even while I was conversing with someone else.  One student sat and ate his lunch with me and talked about the worship ministry he helps lead on Wednesday nights.  We mused on how worshiping in a place week after week for years soaks it in prayer.  It can become almost tangible - like a monastic community.  The place where they do their Wednesday night worship is right where I sit for the prayer station.  Pretty cool how all these different ministry groups overlap.
 

 Another treat of the day was getting to watch a group of male students sing "My Girl" to a giggling, blushing female student and then present her with roses and a t-shirt.  I asked someone what was going on and learned that a fraternity will go with a member who wants to ask someone to go with him to a formal.  They all sing to her a way of asking her to go.  I had seen a similar ritual on other occasions but hadn't known what it meant.  It didn't seem formal enough to be a marriage proposal, but it also didn't seem random.  The singers today did a particularly good job. 

While I was sitting, one of the CNU employees who drives the golf carts/Gators to pick up trash, drove up behind me and walked over to hand me a sprig of bush with a perfect white blossom at the end.  I buried my nose in it and inhaled deeply - can't mistake that fragrance. 
"Do you know what it is?" she asked. 
"I do!" I said.  "It's a gardenia." 
I held it out to my lunch companion and he smelled it as well.  I thanked her, and she hopped back onto her vehicle and drove away.  I have no idea where she found a gardenia on Nov. 5, but I stuck it in my cup holder, and its scent wafted over the prayer station for the rest of the afternoon.

It was labyrinth day again, and I had feared we would be rained out.  A terrible accident with a fatality had blocked I-64 this morning, so it took me over a hour to get down to Newport News.  When I arrived, it was pouring rain.  By the time I set up the prayer station, the rain was mostly over, but I had to wait to see if the Plaza would dry enough to put the labyrinth down.  It did.  More people came to walk it, a couple of whom brought headphones and listened to music while they walked.  What a great idea. 

The young man who had asked me to pray for the people who had stolen his bicycle rode by and told me that a friend had decided to give him his bicycle, so he was back on wheels.  He thanked me for the prayers.  These students blow me away. 

I got to have a nice long chat with a Canterbury student about writing and other fun things and another Canterbury student also came by for a bit.  Today was a day of rich conversations about future plans and prayer and if it's really God's plan when bad things happen to us and how to be present to those whose loved ones have died.  I also got to join United Campus Ministry and the new Lutheran Ministry group for a short evening service in the chapel before meeting with the Episcopal Campus Ministry students.  At the ECM meeting we watched part of Bishop Curry's sermon from his installation and talked about Moses and Prince of Egypt.  It was a most excellent day.

Whenever I'm asked to measure this ministry, I have trouble quantifying it.  Thanks to you, my readers, for being witnesses to the stories that are at the heart of it.

Telling Our Recovery Stories

Last week I went to the Gathering of Recovery Ministries of the Episcopal Church in Seattle.  I will post more about the conference later, but for this post I want to talk about the exercise we did on the first afternoon.  Jan Brown (newly elected VP of RMEC) and Shannon Tucker (current president of RMEC) led a session on "telling our recovery stories."  Shannon moved us by sharing his story of addiction and recovery with vulnerability and honesty and a good sprinkling of humor.  And then Jan asked him to share his story in 5 sentences.  The distilled version was equally as powerful as the longer version had been. 

After Shannon's story, Jan invited those who wanted to give it a try to come forward and share their stories in 5 sentences as a way to introduce themselves to the whole group.  It was also a way to bring many voices into the room, not just those of the presenters.  I was astonished by the courage of those who shared.  One of the goals of the afternoon was to learn a new way to talk about our stories – instead of saying, “Hi, I’m Lauren, I’m a co-dependent/addict/alcoholic,” we were taught to say, “Hi, I’m Lauren, and I’ve been in recovery from co-dependence for 4 ½ years, and what this means for me is …”   Earlier in the morning Becca Stevens had talked about how our stories need to be stories of good news.  Hearing so many stories of recovery was seriously good news to me.  We often hear about how hard it is to recover, and yet it happens all the time.

Try it.  What would your 5 sentence recovery story be?  Don’t opt out – we all need recovery from something.  

Here’s mine:

1.  After a lifetime of exhausting myself striving to please others, I have been in recovery from co-dependence for 4 ½ years. 

2.  I now work part-time as a recovery priest with a non-profit in Williamsburg, Virginia and part-time as a college chaplain. 

3.  Sometimes it seems like I will never be able to let go of all my co-dependent behaviors, but I remind myself that I am a work in progress. 

4.  I am grateful for the health and happiness that I have found on my recovery journey.   

5.  Most of all I am grateful to God for bringing me the help I needed and for putting me in places where I can be of help to others.

Your turn. 

Dudes being Dudes

Last Thursday most of the visitors to the Plaza Prayer Station were dudes.  Not skateboard dudes.  Just the regular kind.  I don't know why I'm surprised when the guys come by to talk.  One of them has stopped by on a number of occasions.  I asked him about a small group that he's part of.  He told me about their meetings - where they share what we at SpiritWorks call "highs and lows."  They call them "ups and downs" or "nopes and dopes."  I had never heard the latter term, and he had to explain that it means the same as highs and lows.  After their check-in, one of them shares something that he's been thinking about and the conversation goes from there.  I told him how wonderful I thought it was that this group of guys could sit around and have honest, open conversation with one another.  Do guys get to do that often?  He said, "It's great.  We're just dudes bein' dudes talkin' about dude stuff."  I laughed with delight.  Dudes bein' dudes.

The next dude who stopped by blew me away.  He told me that his bike had been stolen and asked me to pray for those who had taken it - that maybe they would have a change of heart and make different decisions in the future.  His words stopped me cold.  I just looked at him in shock, unable to speak, astonished at the maturity and wisdom of his request.  He looked back at me and gave a sheepish smile and said, "I know it's kind of cheesy." 

"No," I told him, dead serious.  "It's not cheesy.  It's powerful."  I told him that I would absolutely pray for those who had taken the bike, and I did.  I told him that I was glad he had stopped by and glad to have met him.  Sometimes God teaches us things so gently.  I'm sure I would have had a few choice words for someone who stole my bike - and they wouldn't have been words of prayer.  How grateful I am to that young adult for his understanding of Jesus' message - to pray for those who have hurt us. 

Another young man came by a bit later and said he didn't really have a prayer request but wondered if there was anything I'd like him to pray for at his prayer group meeting that night.  I asked him to pray that those who need the prayer station will find their way to it.  He said he could do that.  And then, as he lingered sitting in the chair next to me, I told him about my other job, working with people healing from addiction, and asked him to pray for those who are struggling with addiction.  He told me that was something near to his heart and that he would do it. 

When I had  arrived at the Prayer Station I was disappointed and grumpy, irritated with myself because I had gone to the ticket office to get our tailgate pass for the Homecoming game, only to find out that they had sold out.  It never even occurred to me that could happen.  Though I couldn't have known, I felt like I had let down both students and parishioners who were planning a fun Saturday afternoon.  It was hard for me to settle in to a posture of prayer.  Again I was grateful for the gift of the students who bless me at least as much I as bless them.  Thanks, God, for the dudes and dudettes, for the young men and women, for the staff and faculty and even guests to campus who stop by the prayer station. 

As I was getting ready to leave, President Trible (PTribs to the students) stopped by to say hello.  He thanked me for my presence on campus and asked me when I would be restarting my weekly Communion service.  He told me he would help me promote it.  Hopefully next semester.  But you know, in a way, the prayer station is its own form of communion, a sacrament by which those of us who come to it are fed and nourished.  The gifts of God for the people of God.  Thanks be to God!

Evening at CNU

Several people have commented about the quality of the light in a picture of the CNU clocktower I posted on Facebook Thursday night as I was walking around campus.  It was a beautiful night, cool, but not cold, the light from the setting sun illuminating various parts of campus.  This post is going to be more of a photo journal of my time.  I had decided to dine on a margherita pizza that I purchased from Hearth-Fire Pizza, a vendor at the CNU Farmer's Market.  Dessert was a Royale cookie from the Student Union - chocolate chips, coconut, macadamia nuts and more!  I called it the cookie with all the stuff until the lady who works at the register told me the official name.  Delicious! 

Shadow in front of doors on right is Violin Guy

After eating dinner and sitting in the Plaza for awhile, I heard a violin start to play.  I've heard it once or twice before.  Turns out a student practices on the front landing of the new Christopher Newport Hall.  Violin Guy is what some of my students call him.  (Apparently they also have Jurassic Park Guy who wears everything from Jurassic Park, Jedi Guy who wears a brown robe, and Matrix Man who dresses like a character in the Matrix.)  Listening to Violin Guy transported me back to late evenings in Sewanee, walking through the quad with friends, having spontaneous leaf fights, and being startled by the melancholy notes of a saxophone played by someone sitting on the Chapel side steps.  It was like having a soundtrack for the evening.

I bumped into a couple of students who were standing on the Great Lawn finishing off snow cones and soaking up the final rays of the sun.  They said they just had to get outside for a few minutes.  After chatting with them for a few minutes, I circumnavigated the Great Lawn a couple of times, getting in a few extra steps, stretching my legs, and savoring the sights and sounds of the CNU campus with the violin music in the background. Students walked and biked past me, and a few rode skateboards or scooters. I heard an "Eeek!" as one young woman almost ran into me. "Sorry ma'am," she said as she rolled by, teetering on a skateboard.  "I'm just learning."  I laughed and told her she was doing a great job.

The clocktower looked almost magical in the orange glow of the sun.  I passed young couples holding hands as they walked and an older couple who were using an out of date map to look for a fountain that has been moved.

I was surprised to notice a statue of St. Francis that I've never seen before.  Such an unusual representation.  Different from the old man in a monk's robe surrounded by animals in a garden.  Just past the statue of St. Francis, I might have seen a dawn redwood tree though I can't be sure. (By the way, scientific name of the dawn redwood:  Metasequoia glyptostroboides - one of the things I remember from my college Dendrology class.  Why is it that the less than useful information is what lingers in my brain while the more important things have disappeared as if they were never there?)  

I felt at peace as I strolled around the campus offering silent blessings as I went.  It really is a lovely campus, and it was a perfect evening to be out in it, just being.  Students seemed a bit more relaxed, having just returned from fall break.  One of the students who talks to me at the Prayer Station wheeled by on his bike and told me he had gotten engaged on Monday.  What a treat to be able to celebrate with him.  As I packed up my chairs and sign to get ready for the meeting with the Canterbury students, I noticed that most of the light had drained from the sky and a moon sliver hung over the campus buildings in the west.  Twinkle lights in the trees near the chapel gave it a holiday feel.  I walked around a little more, breathing in the night sounds and sights, watching the Big Dipper emerge, listening to the water in the chapel fountain, gazing at the play of light and shadow in the twilight.

What a delightful end to the day!

CNU Labyrinth Walk

I took the SpiritWorks "Happy" Labyrinth to the Plaza at CNU this afternoon so that students could walk it during their midterms.  This labyrinth is also known as a Triune Labyrinth.  Turns out that the Plaza is a better location than the Chapel lawn if we want students to encounter it.  So many students came by and read the sign and stared at the labyrinth.  About 15 people walked it.  One student walked twice and another walked 4 times.  She said she had done a paper on the labyrinth but had never gotten to walk one before.  I was so pleased to be able to offer her the opportunity.

Since I began the Plaza Prayer Station, I have made the commitment that I wouldn't share the prayer requests or stories that I hear on this blog because they are personal, and I don't want anyone to find their story on the Internet, even if I don't identify the person.  But I wish I could share a few of the stories from tonight.  Suffice it to say, powerful things were going on in the labyrinth.  How privileged I am to get to hold the space for other people to encounter God.  How grateful I am for the ways that God showed up tonight.

I prayed for people as they walked.  One student practically ran along the path, as if it were a game.  She looked like she was having so much fun.  Three young men walked it together, all very slowly and prayerfully.  They called it a prayer walk.  It was mesmerizing to watch the three forms moving back and forth across the sacred circles.  Most got to the center and then just walked straight out, though I noticed that they wouldn't step on the lines.  One person rode his bike around the outside of the labyrinth a few times, not quite willing to dismount and take the walk.  A few students came up and asked me about the labyrinth but decided not to walk it.  Several clearly felt more relaxed after they had walked. 

I don't think the students get much contemplative time.  They're so busy with so many things.  What a gift some of them gave themselves today to be brave enough to come up and try something new - especially out there in front of everyone.  It was good to have the Canterbury students come and walk it, too - and especially wonderful that some of them helped me pack everything up and carry it to my car.  A group of us then went to see TheaterCNU's production of Noises Off!  I laughed so hard I cried.  I last saw that show in 1986 and had remembered it as one of the funniest plays I'd ever seen.  This cast did a great job, and the spinning set got applause, too!

What a delightful day full of love and laughter and labyrinth.  Bless them, God, as they finish this half of the semester and travel home for Fall Break.  Keep them safe as they travel and fill them with your peace.  Give them rest from their labor and the gift of laughter.

Kyrie Eleison

It's been a hard week.  Lots of people are in pain.  There's a hurricane churning, building strength, pummeling the Bahamas, and stumping the meterologists who have NO IDEA what it's going to do.  And today, while I sat in the student union of CNU praying for students, faculty, and administration, watching brightly colored rain boots pass by me, and chatting with a staffer about a grief group at a local church, a gunman on another college campus in Oregon opened fire.  At least 13 reported to have been killed with more having been injured. 

Kyrie eleison,
Christe eleison,
Kyrie eleison.

Lord, have mercy.  May their souls, and the souls of all the departed, through the mercy of God, rest in peace.

"The United States makes up only 4.6 percent of the world's population, but consumes 80 percent of its opioids -- and 99 percent of the world's hydrocodone, the opiate that is in Vicodin." (source ABC NEWS) 

Why are we in so much pain?

We often ask that question at SpiritWorks as we watch the terrible cycle of addiction playing out over and over.  Why are we in so much pain?

We are a country addicted - to painkillers, to alcohol, to food, to sex, to guns.  We are addicted to entertainment.  We are addicted to our own thinking and opinions.  We are addicted to violence.  We are in so much pain, and we seek to soothe it in so many destructive ways.

Lord, have mercy upon us.
Christ, have mercy upon us.
Lord, have mercy upon us.

I would like to rant about guns and the need to control them and the lack of will in the American people to value life over death.  I would like to rant about racism, poverty, and violence.  I would like to let out a primal scream in despair that we as human beings decree that other human beings are less valuable than ourselves, that other human beings are disposable.  I would like to raise my fist and shout at my fellow Christians, "Where does Jesus say that violence and weapons are part of the kingdom of God?"  Having more people with guns will not make this problem go away!!!

And yes, I know it's more complicated than that.  That is why my rant is so very short.  Underlying all of these issues is the pain. 

Why are we in so much pain?  What can we do to heal the pain?  I know the answer isn't more guns or more drugs or more violence or more food.  We can't soothe it away with substances.  We can't shoot it away.  We don't get rid of it by hurting others or judging others or having power over others.  If I understood him correctly, Jesus said we need to love others and surrender our lives to God.  Like he did.

Please, God, help us turn to you.  Help us to find healthy ways to deal with this deep pain that is swallowing us.  Please heal our pain. 

Kyrie eleison,
Christe eleison,
Kyrie eleison. 

CNU - Share the Love

Today's sermon - about the Plaza Drama a week and a half ago at CNU.  You can read more about the event in the Captain's Log here.

 "Share the Love"

The Rev. Lauren McDonald

Mark 9:38-50

Every Thursday between 12 and 2, I carry two chairs and a sandwich board sign into the Plaza at CNU between the Trible Library and the David Student Union.  My sign says, “How may I pray for you?  Prayers, blessings and conversation.  No strings attached.”  This is the second year that I’ve offered this ministry, and I’ve had the great privilege to talk with students, staff, and faculty who have stopped by with prayer requests or just to chat.  Many times I get to talk with students who are Christian but not Episcopalian, who are part of other campus ministries and who want to talk about faith and Christ or to ask for a prayer but who aren’t looking to join another group.

A week ago during my time at the Plaza Prayer Station, I heard from several students and staff members about an event that had taken place the day before.  On Tuesday night of that week, the entire CNU community received a notice from the Dean of students saying that a street evangelist was going to be in the Plaza during lunch the next day.  Apparently he had been there before, and I was told that there had been some heated exchanges as he told students to repent of their sins lest they find themselves spending eternity in flames.  This time he reserved the Plaza for his preaching, and the dean explained that he was exercising his First Amendment right to free speech.

What happened next is that CNU’s LGBTQ- alliance organization, Spectrum, decided to sponsor a “Share the Love” event that would take place at the same time as the preacher.  Their goal was to talk to students about love and acceptance and to make their presence known.  They respected the open air preacher’s right to speak and peacefully gathered nearby with rainbow flags and signs that said, “Free hugs” and “Carry the Love.”

Thrive is another organization that showed up that Wednesday.  They are a campus ministry group that seeks to unite all the campus ministries.  They sponsor a large worship gathering one Friday evening a month.  Several of their members come talk to me at the prayer station and have participated in our Campus Blessing of the Semester.  They decided to partner with Spectrum in order to share the love that they believe God has for everyone. 

So let me recount who was there.  A street preacher who was preaching about sin and the need to be saved, Spectrum, the LGBTQ group who wanted to share the love, and Thrive, a campus ministry group who wanted to tell everyone gathered that Jesus died for them and that God loved them.  And then there were a whole lot of other students who showed up to see what would happen.  Some came because they were part of one group or another.  Some came because they were curious about what would happen or because they wanted to engage with one of the groups.  Some came because they were expecting, maybe even hoping, to see some sort of a confrontation or show down.

What happened was a peaceful gathering of groups who ordinarily would not coexist in the same space.  Everyone’s rights were respected.  The preacher preached.  The Spectrum students hugged people and carried banners and flags.  The Thrive people brought guitars and led the whole group in worship songs when the preacher took a break.  The CNU newspaper interviewed all parties and did an article and TV segment on the event.  There were some police at the edge of the Plaza, but they didn’t need to do anything because of the peaceful nature of the proceedings. 

Which of these groups was speaking in Jesus’ name?   

Which of these groups was putting a stumbling block in front of others? 

I’m not going to answer those questions. 

I’ve shared this story because of the way it ties in to our Gospel today.  The disciples have witnessed a healer who is not part of their group casting out demons in Jesus’ name.  When they complain to Jesus – like one sibling telling on another – “Dad, make him stop, he’s not one of us,” Jesus tells them not to worry about it.  Whoever is not against us is for us.

In this passage Jesus seems to have an eye on what the man has done – he has successfully cast out demons in Jesus’ name.  The fact that the man has been a catalyst for wholeness and healing is more important than whether he’s hanging out with Jesus and the disciples.  I might argue that there are some who use Jesus’ name to put stumbling blocks in front of others rather than to work for wholeness and healing.  But I think that Jesus would call me out, too, for judging my neighbor.  

Jesus doesn’t seem to want us to focus on what our neighbor is or is not doing or whether this group or that group is doing something the way we think they should do it.  He seems instead to be asking us to focus on ourselves - what we need to do to serve others and what we need to do to keep from putting stumbling blocks in the way of others.  How are we going to contribute to the healing and wholeness of the world?  How are we going to participate in God’s mission to reconcile the world to God’s self?  It’s so much easier to focus on what that one over there is doing than to focus on what we need to be doing.

What makes me proud of the CNU students is how the different groups assembled peacefully and promoted a message of love.  They didn’t all agree with each other, but they did respect each other, and they did, in fact, share the love.  I understand that the street preacher’s message became more positive under the influence of the students’ message.

In this passage I hear Jesus calling us to self-examination.  Looking at where we are contributing to healing and wholeness in the world as well as looking at where we are putting up stumbling blocks. 

This week I have also heard Pope Francis calling our country to that self-examination – to look at ways we need to work together to share the love of God with those in need.  There are so many ways we can offer a cup of water in the name of Christ.  So many ways we can tear down the barriers between us.  So many ways we can contribute to the healing and wholeness of the world.